Ben Affleck, historically a fun person to witness being a celebrity, got candid about his life and career, including his “worst experience” from the latter, in a new cover story for The Hollywood Reporter. 

Throughout the interview, Affleck colorfully sounded off on various topics, including his “world-class Boston finesse” for parallel parking, his “red velvet rope celebrity Wordle group,” why he thinks of golf as the sports version of meth, and how he actually “had a good time at the Grammys,” thank you very much. 

But he became particularly impassioned when speaking about taking on the role of Batman, saying that participating in DC Comics films “became somewhat repetitive to me and less interesting” to him across the several movies in which he appeared. “And by the way, I like a lot of the stuff we did, especially the first one [Batman v Superman],” Affleck said. 

Perhaps not surprisingly, it was 2017’s infamously difficult Justice League that soured him on the experience. “You could teach a seminar on all the reasons why this is how not to do it. Ranging from production to bad decisions to horrible personal tragedy, and just ending with the most monstrous taste in my mouth,” Affleck said of the production, which brought in Joss Whedon to direct after original director Zack Snyder’s daughter died by suicide in 2017. 

The Oscar winner, who has previously shared his misgivings about playing the Caped Crusader, subsequently bowed out of directing his own Batman film. “[Justice League] made me go, ‘I’m out. I never want to do any of this again. I’m not suited,’” Affleck said. “That was the worst experience I’ve ever seen in a business which is full of some shitty experiences. It broke my heart.”

The whole thing was so punishing, Affleck explained, that he “started to drink too much,” adding, “I was back at the hotel in London, it was either that or jump out the window. And I just thought, This isn’t the life I want. My kids aren’t here. I’m miserable. You want to go to work and find something interesting to hang on to, rather than just wearing a rubber suit, and most of it you’re just standing against the computer screen going, ‘If this nuclear waste gets loose, we’ll…’ That’s fine. I don’t condescend to that or put it down, but I got to a point where I found it creatively not satisfying.”

Affleck did, however, suit up once more to play the character in The Flash, which stars Ezra Miller and hits theaters in June. “I did finally figure out how to play that character [Batman], and I nailed it in The Flash,” Affleck said. “For the five minutes I’m there, it’s really great.” But don’t bet on him to save the day on any future projects. “I would not direct something for the [James] Gunn DC. Absolutely not,” the actor said when asked by The Hollywood Reporter. “I have nothing against James Gunn. Nice guy, sure he’s going to do a great job. I just wouldn’t want to go in and direct in the way they’re doing that.”